Miracles Can Happen!

First of all, for those following my weight loss journey, my progress continues – I’ve now lost 64 lbs. on the Skinny Switch Secret diet. That’s a total loss of 132 lbs. from my all-time high weight. Many pounds left to lose, but I truly believe that I WILL lose all that I need to – perhaps not all I’d like to lose, but certainly all I need to lose. That is an important distinction to me and one that I remain mindful of. It would be easy to fall into the trap that societal expectations sets for us and buy into only being successful if you fit the unrealistic “perfect” body image. But I am NOT going there. It won’t happen – as the matter of fact; I really don’t think I want it to happen – so there is no point in torturing myself and setting myself up for failure. I will lose what I need to lose and I WILL be perfect – perfect for me, anyway. For me to truly believe this is a miracle. To have it happen will be another.

There is another huge miracle that has completely blessed my life, and I am so happy that I can barely express it. After 55 years of looking so hard for love and being hurt and frustrated, love actually found me! It came from the most unexpected place – a chance meeting on Twitter, of all things. If you read my last post (Falling in Love – in 140 Characters or Less), you know that, in many ways, being on Twitter has changed my life – I’m met so many wonderful people who have become great friends, mentors, and inspirations. My life has become so much richer from the interactions, support, and love I get every day from these new friends! I am grateful for each and every one of them.

And now, in the most amazing turn of events I could ever imagine, I have met a man who is clearly the great love of my life – my soul mate – on Twitter. We first connected through mutual friends; that’s the way you usually meet people on Twitter, you start following people your friends follow. For a few months, we interacted occasionally and casually – yet there was something about him that I found intriguing – he was smart, funny and sometimes bawdy, but always very sensitive and supportive to his friends when they needed it. I have a real weakness for funny, smart men, so of course I began paying more attention. I didn’t realize for quite some time that he was also paying a lot of attention to me and my interactions – there’s that low self-esteem thing again – until he sent me several private messages that began the intense connection stage of our relationship. We found that we simply couldn’t stop talking to one another – we had many, many common interests, opinions, fears, loves, and passions. Direct messages led to emails, instant messages and finally phone calls. It didn’t take long for both of us to realize that we were falling in love.

This is not an uncomplicated, fairy-tale romance – many miles and even a country border separate us, along with job and family factors. But while there are huge barriers and difficulties, loving him is the easiest, most natural, and most satisfying thing I have ever done. Knowing he feels exactly the same as I do makes me very grateful and blissfully happy. And just like my weight loss quest, I know that this, too, will end in success someday. Our love will carry us through everything to come.

Happy Sweetest Day, my love! Thank you for bringing love into my world! I love you always and forever!

The First 50 Pounds

This is going to be a fairly short post (at least I think it is!). On my last weigh-in on Sunday, my weight took my total lost up to just over 50 pounds. And while that is not nearly as much as I need to lose, it represents a huge leap for my confidence. For me, it says “You can do this. You are doing it. You will continue doing it”. It is a success. And I can’t begin to express how important it is to celebrate every success, no matter how insignificant it might seem to others. The long-term goals are very useful, and keep you focused on the totality of what you are trying to achieve. But it is hard to sustain day-to-day enthusiasm for a project if there are not recognized, interim goals and achievements.

I used to live in the future. (No, I’m not Jane Jetson, or a character on a sci-fi show.) Living in the future means that I put of everything until some later, hoped-for event had occurred. A few examples: “When this project is over, I’ll take some time off to spend with my family”. “After I lose weight, I’ll try dating again”. “When the economy is better, I’ll try to start saving some money.” “One of these days they’ll come up with a diet drug that really works; then I’ll lose some weight.” What I’ve finally learned is that the future never comes. The future is always the future – the future is never now. If you put things off waiting for something that might happen in the future, you’re screwed. Now just might be the only future you will ever have.

So, although I have a lot more to lose, I’m celebrating my first 50 pounds lost. Instead of celebrating by eating, I got a manicure and pedicure; then I got my hair colored, cut and styled so I feel like I look as great as I feel. I’m acknowledging all the hard work that I have done to get to this point. And I’m looking forward to working on the next 50 pounds – not just for the weight that will be lost, but for the growing I will do while I work on it.